Friday, July 11, 2008

Why "Disblogged"?

The preface "dis" means "not."  It can mean "apart from", and implies reversal.  

Previously, I was a working anesthesiologist. But I'll talk more later about my multiple Board Certifications, medical school, residency, and Fellowship. And the 100+ hours I worked per week, with weekend after weekend after holiday after holiday being 'on call'. You can watch TV shows if you are interested in the workings of doctors. My story about all that will eventually be told. 

In the meantime, let me explain: 1) why I chose "disblogged, MD" as my Blog name, 2) catch you up to date on why, with my many rare disorders, I have not yet died, 3) let you jump into my life today, and 4) see where we are and what we can do.

"Disblogged, MD" is me. A physician who was formerly able, and has been 'dis'abled now for over two years. Eighteen hospitalizations? I lost count. Now 'apart from' mainstream society, with a miraculous chance for physical 'reversal' of symptoms. I want to impart that you can be fine one day and not fine the next day. You may know or care for someone who has a disability. If we go through this together, you (both doctors and the general public) will hopefully learn something new every day, that will be useful to your new life.

The only reason I am alive is because God let me live. I went to Heaven while I was waiting to be seen in the Emergency Room, and I turned back to look at planet Earth. I prayed to live long enough to see my young daughter grow up. So here I am, here for a reasons whose proportions have yet to be determined. You are in this with me.

Today, I saw my wonderful and brilliant Cardiologist. Me and one of my Caregivers, Liz, drove a total of 60 miles for this visit. It was a good visit because I was not laying in the fetal position throwing up into his trash bin. At 48 years old, I feel like I have lots in common with those in the 80 year-old age group. In an out of the hospital, wearing "bladder control" pads for the urinary incontinence, watching things when I laugh too hard. Sharing these experiences with other 80 year olds does not help, but instead gets me into the Bladder Control Club.  

Going back just to update you, on April of 2006, I was in a car accident wherein a lady hit me after "blinking" or "sneezing" or something of that sort.  There were no brake marks on the road; therefore, the high-impact, torque spinning of my truck caused many injuries. I'm not ready to tell you about them now, honestly. My point to you is this: I had multiple, rare injuries that spanned over months and months of time. I had to learn to be a patient while my brain thinks like a well-trained physician. I had to believe in myself, act as my own advocate, lay my head on my husband's shoulder, and be determined to live for one more birthday. Speaking of which, I called all my doctor's offices on my recent birthday, and thanked each of them for helping keep me alive.

So where are we, and what can we do? As a society, I do not think we revere either children or the elderly as much as we should. I think that's where we are with the Disabled, too. Look at the Disabled Parking spots around you next time you shop. Is there room for you in the Disabled spot? Many times, I am ousted to the yonders and beyond, or my Caregivers tell me to forgo getting my favorite frozen yogurt and we just head back for home.

What can we do? Start off with me and my life at 48. Learn from it, prepare your own life around it, and plan for the future. You will hopefully be 80 years old someday. If, before or after then, you are also Disabled, the world should be more prepared to let you live. To live at your home before requiring a nursing home, to prevent your accidents, and give you the dignity you deserve. 

Good night. I have to pee again.


  

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Margaret, You are such a great inspiration and a model for everyone to wonder at. I pray for you every day and I hope that you will get the strength to carry on with your excellent work. You are dearly loved by so many people and that is not a hard thing to do in your case. May the good lord bless you and keep you to carry on your work and inspire many others too.

with fondest Love
Your Friend Michael

Anonymous said...

I am a very strong person with a very strong relationship with God, infinite faith in my Lord Jesus Christ, and my ear in tune to the whisperings of the Holy Spirit...you also can have all of this, as I am no one special. I have a lot to live for, and your prayers have kept me alive. God listens to each and every prayer, as they float up to His ear and He contemplates your requests. I stopped asking God for 'things' in my life. I became alive to God and dead to myself not only at my baptism, but every day. I urge you to ask God to Open the Doors before you that need to be opened, and to Close the Doors behind and ahead of you that need to be closed. Let Him lead your life. Keep your trust and faith in God and His magnificent glory. I thank each and every person that has prayed for me; God listens and I am getting better. Put your prayers together with one other person.......keep steadfast each day, in doing not your will, but the Will of God.