Sunday, March 22, 2009

Day #6 Off a Continuous Infusion

We went to church today, several days after our pastor at First Baptist had interviewed me regarding my overwhelming recovery. After listening to a string of regularly-scheduled items such as daycare, a book written by a survivor, and other odds and ends, the human being in me was miffed. Miffed because I had been selected to be one of God's miracles and a great balloon of Praise, Glory, and Witnessing was subdued and internalized in my soul. I wanted to sing God's praises and tell my story to the church, because I was overflowing with the magnitude of God's grace. 

I was wearing a poncho with tassles, and I asked the Pastor to pretend that he was my iv and iv bag/pump. Quickly, I ran carefully up and down the aisles. I praised God as I  had my freedom from the iv now! Freedom! I can run to the left! I can run to the right! I can suddenly stop! I can turn around and go in another direction any time  I want, and I don't have to keep track of my direction, my iv tubing, or my iv bag. No more batteries that run out and stop my iv pump. No more bags of iv fluid to keep blood going to my brain. Thanks to God, and thanks to Dr. Verapamil, my neurologist of my cardiologist's selection. For about 2 weeks, I feel much better!

I use my cane so as to prevent falling or imbalance. When I stand up to move to another seat, I subconsciously feel for my iv bag and tubing, since I am in the habit of treating these things as if my life depended on it. My hand goes backwards behind me to feel for the tubing, and I remind myself that God has bestowed a miracle upon me.

How does it feel to be a miracle? It feels the same as having faith and confidence in God, as if He is in control of my life. He knew this would happen. He knew it long ago, and He saved it up for a surprise for me. And to be a Testimony and a Witness to God's promises. Having been 'raised' Catholic and then 'reborn under baptism', I always had faith in God. He has worked some incredible stories, wonderful additions, and inspires hope. Now, I could serve as a testimony, and I feel like I am now 'a grown up Christian' as I lean on God from day to day.

Lunch with mother turned into a fantastic lunch with my caregiver, and with Renee's other daughter, Rita. We ate golden rice and peas with dill, as well as turkey patties. To the right was the Griffith Park Observatory, and to my left was downtown Los Angeles. Views out of every room, memories of past times, and sorjourn love. Broken, fractured arm and boy. Do you ever find out who your friends really are.

Message for today? Bring God into your life every day. Thank Him for all you do have in the shelter of your home with a wireless server , especially if you can. Live each and every day for His Will, not yours. Expect changes to happen, because He knows what you need since the day you were born. Life is what happens while you are seeking to plan your life.

Ask for Open Doors to open at the right time, and for Doors that are supposed to be Closed by God, to be closed at the right time. Thank you for blessing us as we Praise Your Name and your righteousness, even if (and especially with) the sky is falling down upon us. You still hold us in Your hands. Thanks be to God.